It S My F Ing Birthday
Download It S My F Ing Birthday PDF/ePub or read online books in Mobi eBooks. Click Download or Read Online button to get It S My F Ing Birthday book now. This website allows unlimited access to, at the time of writing, more than 1.5 million titles, including hundreds of thousands of titles in various foreign languages.
It's My F---ing Birthday
“In the coming year,” she said, hoisting her blindingly clean and gleaming glass into the air, “may half of all your dreams come true.” “Mom,” I said to her, “isn’t that kind of pathetic?” “Well, it’s realistic.” It’s her thirty-sixth birthday, and she really thought things would be different this year—that she’d have figured out men and how to get along with her narcissistic parents enough to survive a birthday celebration. But nothing’s changed. Her disappointing day is capped off by the delivery of a huge bouquet of flowers from Carl, with whom she has recently, and bitterly, split. A gesture of reconciliation? Of passive aggression? She’s too unhinged to tell. It’s My F---ing Birthday unfolds in seven state-of-my-life addresses this hapless high school art teacher writes to herself on consecutive birthdays, as she is determined to break the patterns of behavior that are keeping her down. Her objective: to avoid making the same mistakes over and over and start making some new ones. Through seven outrageously funny years of needling parents, self-absorbed boyfriends, riots, O.J., and Monica—and bigger and bigger bouquets from Carl—she navigates a circuitous (and ultimately successful) route to happiness in a world where everything seems to conspire to the contrary. What I Learned This Year That I Need to Remember 1. No more taking the bait from Mom. Even if the fight becomes about not taking the bait. 2. No more dwelling in the past. 3. Try much harder to continue being a vegetarian. This will limit the restaurants the folks can take me to. 4. No more trying to decode the flowers from Carl. If he sends them again, just think of them as a fun, free thing, like a little sample box of cereal or detergent that suddenly appears in the mailbox. 5. Don’t make a big deal out of the fact that there were no guys this year. Perhaps that’s a better thing than continuing to get involved with guys who exhibit behavior from the beginning that indicates the whole thing is completely hopeless. So try to remember the above as a coping strategy when I am so crazed with horniness that I want to throw myself off a building. 6. No more mumbo jumbo. This means no more calling 900 astrology numbers listed at the end of horoscopes in women’s magazines to find out my love forecast. And no more going to psychics, no matter how dicey things get.
Bad Boy Romance
Opposites attract when the bad boy meets the good girl. Get all three exciting romance books in one complete set. Alone With The Bad Boy Alone overnight at the store with the school bad boy. That's not what I planned on when I hid in the bathroom until well after closing. I thought I was by myself, which was why I started trying on clothes outside the dressing room. I wasn't expecting to be caught in my underwear by anyone. Least of all by the intimidating guy everyone warned me was dangerous. If that isn't bad enough, he is also my secret crush. Attracted To The Bad Boy Fake dating this bad boy is looking like the perfect revenge. When I went to surprise my boyfriend for his birthday, the last thing I expected was to catch him cheating on me. With the bad boy's girlfriend. Dax was there too, and we rode off on his motorcycle. Then during the breakup with my boyfriend, I might have said that I am now dating Dax. How am I going to face Dax at school tomorrow with my ex spreading all these rumors about us? Deceived By The Bad Boy I knew he was trouble, but I didn't know I'd be in this kind of danger! I'm stuck with the scary new guy as my partner on this class project. He was kicked out of his last school, and I think he might be a criminal. So, why am I meeting him for secret motorcycle rides and forbidden kisses? I know he's hiding something, but finding out what it is could be lethal.
Sex and Sensibility
Author: Genevieve Field
language: en
Publisher: Simon and Schuster
Release Date: 2005-02-01
It's all about you. Your apartment. Your job. Your dates. Your sex life. Your time off. Your exercise. Your food. Your music. Your future. What are you waiting for? Who will you love? What is it, really, that you want? The life of a single woman in the twenty-first century is full of new connections, new sex, new love, and new loss. It's about letting the laundry pile up, sipping strong drinks with near strangers, and dishing to girlfriends on those foggy-headed, flushed morning-afters. But it isn't all heightened connections and steamy dates. The single girl is no stranger to the scramble for a Saturday night plan, the oh-so-promising guy who took her number at a party and then -- poof! -- disappeared, the ever narrowing circle of unattached girlfriends.... In Sex and Sensibility twenty-nine of today's most acclaimed -- and often bestselling -- female authors write about the push-pull between independence and vulnerability, fearlessness and self-doubt that defines single life. Jennifer Weiner, Pam Houston, Laurie Notaro, Amy Sohn, and Julianna Baggott are just a few of the real-life heroines whose stories about long-distance dating, twenty-something divorce, online crushes, and thrilling one-night stands make up this funny, frank, and unabashedly erotic celebration of singlehood and sisterhood -- a quintessential handbook for today's independent woman.