Improbables A Satire About Very Large Numbers
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IMPROBABLES: a satire about very large numbers
Always the same destination… …an extinction event This is not the first version of the universe. Our technology brings us to an extinction event and we self-destruct, again and again. 1,142 times so far. Can we finally break the cycle? Or are we stuck in a simulation? A Prequel - NO EXPERIENCE NECESSARY Mathematics professor Lawrence Chu is in love with professor Kassman. One night he made a drunken claim that the central tendency of the universe indicated they should kiss again. The seemingly nonsensical argument that followed resulted in a breakthrough mathematical model and a weapon. This is a history of that weapon. They are the Goodness Empire and they control 80% of the universe. Don't let the name fool you. It is an empire built on conquest and slavery. Five former enemies now navigate a bumpy new era of cooperation. Chiro is First Minister and head of the largest faction. He is a ruthless leader and 80% is not enough for him. Scientists are about to give him the weapon he needs to finally destroy the rebels in the outer spiral arms. Elaine McGee is a teacher in a slump. Dark clouds follow her everywhere. So she's making changes. She's broken up with her lying, cheating boyfriend and quit smoking for a start. She's in a tent out in the woods making a plan to turn her life around. A weekend of fresh air and fresh starts. Then the spaceship arrived. Welcome to the Final War, Earthling. RESET Behind the matter/anti-matter barrier it is just another quantum physics experiment. Remove the barrier and it will destroy the universe. Can the most improbable team ever created save us? What should you do? Use all your vacation and call your mother. THE FINAL WAR HAS BEGUN. Get IMPROBABLES now.
Earth Journals
She’s saving the Earth from invasion… …on a part-time basis. Duff is sent to Earth as part of the bargain she made to get out of prison. The former interrogator turned inmate has come to assess Earth’s defensive capabilities. Given only two days of preparation, she is dumped in Central Florida in the middle of the night. She is weaponless. Her only pieces of equipment are her interactive glasses and an Optool that lets her change her appearance. But the Optool is malfunctioning. When that happens, she never knows who she will look like. Duff studies human interactions via Moments, a long-running daytime soap opera. Carefully analyzing it, she learns about aspects of human interaction that do not occur in her species. Simple things like sarcasm, metaphors, and idioms are new to her. It doesn't take long before she becomes one of the show's biggest fans. Can Duff avoid discovery? Can she keep Earth out of the clutches of the Yirgo Trading Group? Can Duff save Moments after its cancellation is announced? She’s big, she’s green, and she is the only reason we haven’t been invaded ... yet. Get Earth Journals now and follow the misadventures of your favorite soap-opera obsessed alien. My name is Makeda Keita Defo un Re Duff and I approve this message.
Earth Journals 2 - A New Home
Aliens are coming to destroy the Earth for it's mineral wealth. But first they have to get past Duff. Everyone's favorite big green soap opera obsessed alien is back and she's saving the planet on a part time basis, again. When Duff launches American nuclear missiles the entire world goes on high alert. Join Duff, American President Sterling Connard, Vladimir Putin, Kim, Jung Un, and Chinese President Xi as they face the prospect of complete planetary annihilation. Can a president obsessed with his reelection campaign, his investment portfolio, and getting laid by the first lady keep it together long enough to save our planet? Are Los Angeles and San Francisco doomed as part of his election strategy? Join Duff as she navigates the dangerous pathways of human incompetence. Don't be fooled by imitators and conspiracy theories...there is only one Duff and she's the only reason you're alive to read this. My name is Makeda Keita Defo un Re Duff and I approve this message.